In learning to ride a flying machine; if you are looking for perfect safety you will do well to sit on a fence and watch the birds, but if you really wish to learn you must mount a machine and become acquainted with it's tricks by actual trial.
-Wilbur Wright, 1901
Steven (3:12:15 PM): so...story time... if you have time of course
Ryan (3:12:23 PM): uh, sure!
Ryan (3:12:33 PM): There once was a stegosaurus who came out purple
Ryan (3:12:55 PM): all the other stegosauri in his family were shades of green and brown, but he was bright purple and all the other stegs made fun of him
Ryan (3:13:06 PM): wouldn't let him play in any steggy games, that sort of thing
Steven (3:13:14 PM): oh no
Ryan (3:14:15 PM): jaded from a lifetime of ridicule from a genetic accident far beyond his control, and lacking both the dexterity and scientific capacity to change his pigmentation, he retired to a quiet island in the Pangea Mediterranean for a life of exile
Ryan (3:14:53 PM): there he met a nice neon orange pterodactyl named Herbert, and together they lived out the rest of their days in friendship
Ryan (3:14:57 PM): then, the meteors came.
Steven (3:15:33 PM): yayish
Ryan (3:17:55 PM): how's that?
Steven (3:19:33 PM): well he was happy, but then died a painful death in the destruction of his people
For the record, he was asking me about my recent work promotion (woo!). In the back of my mind the whole time was this comic from the PBF, which you should all read the hell out of.
As you may or may not know, I take my zombie lore fairly seriously. I've studied zombies on paper, in cinema, and other forms of media. I've plotted out outbreak scenarios and formulated contingency plans, and as a result recently finished my first zombie novel (The Next Most Dangerous Game). I've begun evaluating potential groomsmen for my upcoming wedding based on fitness against the zombpocalpyse, like somebody I know once did.
My roommates and I even have a rule that any strange noises/shambling figures between the hours of midnight and 8am can and will be treated as hostile creatures looking for food. Destroy the brain first, ask questions later.
SO. Pranksters of the world, take note: this shit is not even remotely funny.
I'm not a fan of laundry list posts, but this is more for me than anybody. Plus I just rolled out a survey post, which is pretty lame too. Deal :D
So it's about halfway through June, which means summer is approximately half over for me.
Finals ended Saturday, May 3rd. As soon as I was done with all my finals and a paper, I left Purdue. Jenny and I went to Cincinnati for about a week, went to Union Terminal to see Bodies (the Exhibition) and went to a Red's game. Then I came back and moved into Earhart, and had a week of straight training before jumping right into work. Since then I've beaten Metroid Prime: Corruption and read some books I've wanted to for a while (mostly stuff I put off during the school year). I went to Joey Steenbergen's wedding, and Benji & Corrie's wedding reception. My 22nd birthday came and went. I performed a special summer improv show for Earhart Hall summer school residents with most of the SoF. I've gone to see Iron Man and Indy 4. I've posed as a model for a Purdue brochure. I stopped biting my fingernails! I've kept up on my goal of posting here and on my other story site at least once a week (but not much more). I have also picked up a few extra hours helping with Day on Campus Tours, but for the most part I've been relaxing and hanging out with my friends that have been here (including a game of the new D&D 4.0 rules).
Pretty busy, I think. I am trying not to waste away my summer, but really relax and not overstress. I need some time to recharge my batteries. Thinking back to last summer, I should've either gotten more rigid deadlines from Dr. D for our research, or seriously considered limiting myself to just either a job, or my fellowship.
So where does that leave me for the rest of the summer? I've got from now until summer "ends" with the start of class- Monday August 25th. As of now:
I have about 25 hours of work every week for most of the rest of that time. I don't know when my last day will be, but the last day I could possibly work is August 8th.
That's also the last day for my current apartment lease, so sometime around there I'll need to move. That means up until then I need to continue whittling down the things I have here at Earhart. Peace has to move out, and I'll have to sort out everything there between me n' Alex. Then between Jenny, probably Greg, and hopefully mom coming to help, I'll move everything out of Earhart and Harrison over to my new apartment on the landing.
Mom wants me to try and go to an airshow July 19 and 20th, but I don't know if I'll be able to get off of work then. Similarly, my favorite holiday (4th of July) is coming up, and I'd like to hang out with everybody near Purdue and watch the fireworks, but I may have to work.
I'd like to go to Ft. Wayne and visit Andy and Jacque, and possibly someplace in Chicago - maybe see Scott? On top of that, Monday August 11th, Jenny and I are thinking about going to Green Bay WI to see the Bengals play the Packers @ Lambeau for the preseason. This may or may not count as our anniversary celebration. :D All of that takes a ton of money and gas is a lot more expensive than past summers, so we'll see. I will probably go home after apartment moving and before classes.
GenCon in mid-August, maybe? Also if I can get the right ticket, maybe a Judas Priest concert with future roommate Greg (how much would that rule?)
I will try and make it through the rest of my pile of books, Beard's comics, and finish at the very least Pokemon Diamond and Super Mario Galaxy. I've also got some computer maintenance to do (clean out bookmarks, clean up music files, etc.) but that's not high priority.
I'm going to make a point to keep posting to my blogs. By my best estimate, I have 14 chapters of my story left until I hit my goal [(50k - current 31,819) / 1300 word/chapter average) = 13.9]. I won't stop until I hit 50k, but I also won't quit until I've told my story. At one chapter/week average, I'll be done in 14 weeks, which means I won't finish before the summer ends. Fine, except my posting rate plummets as school picks up.
I should go give blood again, soon.
The last thing I'm writing about as a goal for the summer directly parallels my feeling about it. Something I've been putting off since the end of school. I need to talk to my counselor and get registered for the fall, and possibly take a summer class for July. Ugh. Do. Not. Want.
I think NaNoWriMo completely burned me out on writing, seriously. I haven't updated my NNWM story since a few days before the end of November (and I feel kinda bad, because quite a few people bothered to read it, and I'm guessing they're sick of checking for non-existent updates).
Worse, things on my writing front aren't going to improve anytime soon. About the only thing I write about in *this* blog with any regularity is football, and fantasy football ends this week, college bowls by the first week of January, and this is the penultimate week of regular season football. I am sad for that.
I'm leaving to go home in a few hours, and I'll be back to Purdue probably around the end of the year. I'm not addicted to the internet like Current Roommates Alex and John, so I won't take my computer home (that's a pain in the ass anyway, though I really do need to break down the 'ol compy and dust 'er off). Basically, I won't be updating much for a while at home.
On top of all that, this upcoming semester (starting January 7th) is probably one of the most important of my collegiate career. I need to seriously buckle down and overcome some academic roadblocks I've been struggling with for quite some time.
My rough attempt at a plan involves not working (already quit my job), scaling back my role at the improv club (read: less worrying over details/let new guys step up), and take out more student loans to worry less about money. The last one is almost paradoxical, but from last semester I think it is worth a try. There are some other things, but I don't want to list them here.
Also, on the proactive side of life, I need to start finding something to do this summer. I can easily go back to my old job as a summer conference assistant, but that's a step backwards and I'm getting sick of it. I want to do something engineering, something I am proud to put on my resume...but that's easier said than done with my gpa.
I tell myself to cut some slack because I'm stretching myself academically like whoa, but still...nobody to blame but yours truly. Get it together, Ryan.
Space is limited In a haiku, so it's hard To finish what you
Quick! What is the most terrifying animal you can think of?
I suppose it's no big secret that I have a strong dislike of owls. Still, I know that's a personal thing, so I don't expect everybody to understand why I find them so frightening. I mean, you've got the whole silent flight thing, the giant glowing eyes, the rotating head bit, the horrifying screech as it swoops from the sky, but yeah, I guess there's some beauty or somesuch in there.
No, I'm here to discuss an even greater predator, one who I would argue is much more dangerous. More dangerous, and quite frankly, must be stopped before it's too late.
Sure, technically it's a "dolphin", and you may have seen them at your local themed waterpark performing some stupid pet tricks, but the Orcinus orca, better known a killer whale is working on becoming the most dangerous predator on the planet. Here's why:
1. They are built to destroy. Look at this fucking thing. It's a living torpedo of death. They grow about 27 feet long, and weigh over six tons. That's six tons of muscle and teeth and just enough fat to insulate them from the frigid waters they prowl. They can swim 30 miles an hour and dive to 100 feet. Want to know how you'd stack up? An olympic swimmer can go 5 miles an hour and a champion diver about 55 feet, unaided. Also, orcas have no extraneous body parts. There is nothing on their bodies that serves any purpose other than survival. They eat an average of 500 pounds of food every day (and I mean real food, not strained krill).
2. They hunt in packs. A killer whale by itself is an engine of destruction. Now imagine facing a pod of them, which could mean on average, six to forty of them. Sure, there are creatures in the ocean that could take on one orca and have a fighting chance (but not many). Forty? You're pretty much screwed.
3. They are everywhere. Orcas swim wherever the hell they want, when they want to. Despite decades of "tracking" and "tagging" orcas, scientists really don't have any damn clue how they migrate because orcas know better than to be so predictable.
Think I'm kidding?
4. They're fucking smart. The oldest known orca lived to be at least 89 years old, which means they've got a generous lifetime to learn some how to become better predators. We already know they're smart enough to learn complex song and dance routines. We also know dolphins can pass the mirror test - the first non primates to do so. Still, this pales in comparison to their hunting techniques:
* Orcas have been known to vomit onto ice flows to attract gulls. Once the birds land to check it out, the orca waiting nearby pops up and eats it. Captive orcas have shared this behavior by showing the other whales how to do it.
* Groups of orcas release coordinated bursts of bubbles from their blowholes to form a "cage" to trap fish, and then "slap" the water with their fins to stun the fish with water shockwaves. This is known as carousel feeding, and they take turns.
* Sometimes, orcas will attack sharks. Once they kill them, the often eat the nutrient-rich liver first, a Mortal-Kombat inspired finish. They know where the most valuable parts are, and they aren't afraid to get them.
* They've been known to take on blue whales - a creature about 120 feet long and 200 tons. That's a target roughly 4x as long and 33x bigger. Humans are fair game as well.
* They aren't afraid to resort to cannibalism, if they have to.
* When hunting larger prey, like seals, orcas are known to head-butt, tail slap, ram, or even breach (partially leap out of the water) and land on the things. Can you imagine the sight of a 30 foot whale leaping out of the water trying to body slam you? They've also been observed in pairs tossing baby seals in the air to each other before eating.
* You aren't safe on land, as mother orcas have been seen pushing their young onto the beach to grab prey, and pulling them back into the water by their tails if they stray too far.
*
If after all of that, you still aren't convinced, do me a favor. Imagine yourself underwater, in a diving suit. The water around you is so cold, it's possible you could die of hypothermia before you drowned. It's so deep and murky that you can barely see your hand in front of you. Now plug some headphones into your computer, turn up the volume, and close your eyes as you listen to the sounds of your approaching doom.
Fortunately for us, orcas are confined to the seas...for now. We've established they're physically superior in every way, have strength of numbers, and may even be smarter than we give them credit for. Still, that's no reason for us to get complacent. These are the ultimate apex predators of the sea, and if we're not careful, of the earth. I suggest we take a proactive approach and observe them, to make sure they never, ever get opposable thumbs.
As the midpoint of October passes, I find myself contemplating participation in this year's National Novel Writing Month, or NaNoWriMo for short (an idea I've toyed with before). The basic idea is that many people would like to write a novel at some point, but either never start or quit easily because of lack of commitment, motivation, endless editing, desire for perfection, and other reasons. NaNoWriMo seeks to throw all that out the window and impose an arbitrary deadline - 30 days of November to write 50,000 words of new fiction in hopes of motivating people to finish, not to worry about quality. I think it's a novel idea. I find myself with a little bit of extra time this fall (and I'm a bit crazy), so I could give it a shot? I've got a few ideas for some stories, I enjoy writing and I wouldn't mind testing my endurance, story planning skills, and my wrists. I have until the end of this month to decide, knowing full well I'd probably blog less (and those posts would probably just be word count updates). I think I would start another blog just for this, so you could read along.
Thoughts? Like giving blood, I think this is something that's easier with support, so if any of my readers want to join along, that'd be great!
Also, I am addicted to the NaNoWriMo forums. The variety of general questions for aspiring novelists is fascinating.
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On a semi-related note, I am chomping at the bit to hear back from a woman about a possible new job. I've been looking for a new one that I don't hate since leaving my previous job as Student Office Staff at Hillenbrand (which is Jenny's new job, actually). If something comes of it, I'll write more.
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More stupid Bee Movie shorts in my The Office commercial breaks this week. Didn't really matter, since tornado warnings in the area cut out about 1/3 of the episode. I'm trying not to complain, though, since there really was significant weather. A tornado apparently touched down a few miles south of here. We set up the emergency broadcast system for a reason, no?
Also, if anybody wants a free one month trial to Netflix, I've got the hookup.
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